How to treat a girl, take four: The little things


Coffee. Part of the morning routine. It’s the first thing I do once I get out of the shower. I know what you’re thinking. No shit. That’s part of everybody’s morning routine.

I don’t drink coffee. Never have and probably never will, unless you count the rare frappuccino, which is essentially dessert in a cup. Not exactly part of a nutritious breakfast.

So why do I make coffee? Because Shana drinks it. Just an example of one of the little things that really matter. Some other little things that matter? …


Guys, expect to pay. No getting around it. If you’re pursuing the girl, you should pay for the dates. That doesn’t mean you have to eat at five-star restaurants or spend a ton of money. It simply means you should reach for, and expect to, cover the check.

On the other hand, it doesn’t mean you should ask your date to order off the kids menu at McDonald’s. Try something like that, and I guarantee your chances at taking the next step, including any sort of physical attention, are history.

A lot of guys are going to read those last two paragraphs and say it’s bullshit and unfair. As my father has said for years, life is unfair.

But, here’s the rub. Once you’ve wooed the girl, you’re going to find that they’ll start picking up the check. Or maybe I’m just one lucky bastard. Shana does pick up a lot of the tabs. Her philosophy is that’s the way it should be once you’re in a relationship. That’s a very mature way to look at it. It probably helps that she’s treated quite well.


Something I’ve learned in the last several months is that women’s signals are not as difficult to pick up on as we men would like to make them out to be. It’s really just a matter of paying attention. By listening and paying attention, you’ll start to get it. And if you understand what’s wrong, there’s probably something you can do to help.

The girlfriend has had a few bad days at work. You’d be amazed what sending flowers can do for them, and what that does for you and your relationship in return. And it doesn’t have to cost a ton of money.

Earlier this week, she clearly was having a blah day at work. During a trip to Target for a few groceries, I spotted a pair of earrings I thought she’d like. They cost $8. She wore them today to work … to brag to her co-workers. She’s still wearing them at 9:30 p.m. because “I just want to keep wearing them because that was so sweet.”


Dancing is intimidating. A lot of guys refuse to. I know damn well I can’t dance all that well. So, I asked Shana to show me how. She’s a former drill team captain and knows a little bit about the subject.

But I know she appreciated that I was willing to swallow my pride, ask her to teach me and try. We’ve had one lesson so far, and she’s an awesome teacher. Apparently, with a little help, you don’t have to look like Kevin James in Hitch.

The little things are important. They lead to big things. Trust me.


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