Mike Anderson: The Missouri tenure remix

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Snake. Traitor. Turncoat. A friend even asked how many times I’d refer to former Missouri coach Mike Anderson as a scumbag in this blog.

But here’s the deal: College sports is business. It’s about money. If you’re a coach, it’s all about that “destination job.” Arkansas, while no better than Missouri (especially in its current state), is Anderson’s dream job.

That he left Missouri after five seasons isn’t the issue. How he left is. Regarded by many, including myself, as a stand-up guy, Mike Anderson was a coward last week when he left Missouri.

He also lied. Lied about retiring at Missouri. Lied to his players about his intentions. Lied again Saturday when asked why he had nothing to say to his former employers and fans in Missouri.

Again, it’s a business. Mike Anderson has every right to do what he wants. He got more money to coach at a place where he cut his teeth. Good for him. But shame on him for the way he snuck out of Missouri and treated players he recruited to play for him in Columbia, Mo.

Ironically, Missouri could be better off in the long run with his departure. But I’ll get to that in another blog. Enough of the seriousness, let’s take a look at the Mike Anderson era in music videos:

FEBRUARY 2006: Missouri loses by 26 to a Baylor team that not only didn’t play a nonconference schedule, but also hadn’t won a game. His tenure is over within days. The reaction of Missouri fans …

MARCH 25, 2006: The day before Anderson is hired at Mizzou, rumors swirl that the board of curators might fire athletic director Mike Alden. In a shrewd move, Alden has secured Anderson. Still, it was a lot like this …

MARCH 26, 2006 TO DECEMBER 2006: The Anderson era begins. With a  great introduction press conference, followed by a 9-0 start, including, ironically, a blowout of Arkansas, Tiger fans welcome the coach with …

JULY 2007 TO MARCH 2008: That July senior forward Kalen Grimes is kicked off the team after hitting somebody in the face with a shotgun (seriously). Six months later, senior point guard Stefhon Hannah gets the boot after suffering a broken jaw in a fight outside of a bar. Several other Tigers are suspended. Missouri finished 16-16 …

2008-09 SEASON: Missouri goes 28-6 in the regular season, knocking off Kansas, Texas and Oklahoma before winning the Big 12 Tournament. The Tigers then stun Memphis in the Sweet 16 and push top-seeded UConn in the Elite Eight while falling just short of a trip to the Final Four. The 31 wins represent a school record. To Anderson, all Missouri fans say …

2009-10 SEASON: Missouri goes 23-11 despite the loss of 1,000-point career scorers DeMarre Carroll, Leo Lyons and Matt Lawrence. The Tigers make the second round of the NCAA Tournament, pushing eventual Final Four squad West Virginia. Anderson also signs his first two top-50 recruits (Tony Mitchell and Phil Pressey) and the country’s top-ranked junior college player (Ricardo Ratliffe). So, at this point, he’s …

2010-2011 SEASON: Despite a 14-1 start and the emergence of Marcus Denmon, the Tigers slump to 8-8 in the Big 12, get thumped by Texas A&M in the Big 12 tourney and lose in the opening round of the NCAAs. They also lose Mitchell, who never plays a game at Mizzou after being declared ineligible by the always fair and reasonable NCAA. Despite all of this, Anderson flirts with another school for the third straight year and appears to be in line for another raise, leaving a lot of Missouri fans to say …

MARCH 2011: Just a few days after saying he planned on retiring at Missouri, it becomes clear Anderson is going to Arkansas …

MARCH 2011: Anderson hides from the media upon his return to Columbia, going to great lengths to avoid questions and being seen. Not until Saturday did he offer an explanation for his actions during the departure or thank anybody at Mizzou publicly, to which many Tigers say …

MARCH 2011: Anderson does deserve credit for recruiting a classy group of rising seniors who should help the transition to a new coach go smoothly. Despite clearly being angered and hurt, Laurence Bowers, Marcus Denmon and Kim English took the high road in a press conference the day their coach bailed. A great reason to take this in a group of solid young men …

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NCAA Tournament predictions: The entertainment hodgepodge edition

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March Madness. It’s Christmas in the spring. Here are my opening-round picks (winners in all caps), brought to you by a hodgepodge of music, movie and TV clips …

EAST REGION

NO.1 OHIO STATE vs. No. 16 Texas-Antonio: Country star Dwight Yoakam attended OSU and covered Johnny Cash’s “Ring of Fire,” which is what the Roadrunners are falling into …

NO. 8 GEORGE MASON vs. No. 9 Villanova: Royals GM Dayton Moore is a Patriot, so we go with his alma mater (Enjoy the Mad Jack Harry clip. Dude is like the old guy off “Network) …

NO. 5 WEST VIRGINIA vs. No. 12 Clemson: Antoine Fuqua attended WVU before he directed “Training Day.” Clemson’s day will end like this …

NO. 4 KENTUCKY vs. No. 13 Princeton: Kentucky grad Harry Dean Stanton, now starring on “Big Love,” was Molly Ringwold’s old man in “Pretty in Pink.” Princeton winds up like James Spader …

NO. 6 XAVIER vs. No. 11 Marquette: Like alum Robert Romanus, who played Mike Damone in “Fast Times at Ridgemont High,” the Muskateers have a five-point plan …

NO. 3 SYRACUSE vs. No. 14 Indiana State: Unless Larry Bird is in the lineup, the Sycamores have no shot, even if Syracuse alum Peter Falk starts …

NO. 7 WASHINGTON vs. No. 10 Georgia: I’m still not sure if “Lump” by The Presidents of the United States of America is a good or bad thing. If it’s bad, Georgia will be lump. Oh, and the band’s bassist, Dave Dederer, attended graduate school at UW …

NO. 2 NORTH CAROLINA vs. No. 15 Long Island: The Tar Heels, like former UNC student Jack Palance, advance because they “crap bigger” than the Blackbirds …

WEST REGION

NO. 1 DUKE vs. No. 16 Hampton: Randall Wallace went to Duke. He also wrote “Braveheart.” With the exception of the ending, the Blue Devils are William Wallace in this mismatch …

No. 8 Michigan vs. NO. 9 TENNESSEE: Volunteer David Keith, whose big break came in “Office and a gentleman,” also had a great role in “Major League II.” Michigan figures to be Rick Vaughn from this scene …

NO. 5 ARIZONA vs. No. 12 Memphis: Anybody who says the NCAA Tournament committee doesn’t like its quirky storylines is fooling themselves. Josh Pastner, the former Wildcat, now the Tigers’ coach. Not an accident. As for the game, compared to Arizona, Memphis (Linda Ronstadt attended Arizona) …

NO. 4 TEXAS vs. No. 13 Oakland: A lot of folks like the Grizzlies here. I’m not one of them. The Longhorns, like UT grad Matthew McConaughey as Wooderson, are just too cool for Oakland …

No. 6 Cincinnati vs. NO. 11 MISSOURI: Sheryl Crow? Brad Pitt? No thanks, we’ll go with MU alum George C. Scott as “Patton” ….

NO. 3 CONNECTICUT vs. No. 14 Bucknell: Former Huskie Tony Todd played the title role in the horror film “Candyman.” UConn will torture the Bison similarly here …

NO. 7 TEMPLE vs. No. 10 Penn State: Before an amazing run in the conference tourney, the red-hot Nittany Lions were NIT-bound. They’re still not beating former Owl Bill Cosby’s squad …

NO. 2 SAN DIEGO STATE vs. No. 15 Northern Colorado: Carl Weathers is a former Aztec football star. NCU figures to end up like Weathers in this scene from “Predator” …

SOUTHWEST REGION

NO. 1 KANSAS vs. No. 16 Boston University: The Jayhawks cruise, even with alum Mandy Patinkin and Inigo Montoya in the starting lineup …

NO. 8 UNLV vs. No. 9 Louisville: Suge Knight went to UNLV. He also got Tupac and Dre together for this tune before the latter bolted from Death Row records …

NO. 5 VANDERBILT vs. No. 12 Richmond: Vandy’s a fine school, but talk about slim pickings for famous alum who are now entertainers …

NO. 4 LOUISVILLE vs. No. 13 Morehead State: Chuck Woolery went to Morehead State, which will be out in one-and-one (as opposed to two-and-two). Still, this clip is great. Bring back “The Love Connection” …

NO. 6 GEORGETOWN vs. No. 11 VCU: Good for the Rams extending their middle finger at the experts who ripped their selection. Carl Reiner is a Hoya. He also directed this classic …

NO. 3 PURDUE vs. No. 14 St. Peters: Being a little short-handed won’t hurt the Boilermakers in their opener. Col. John “Hannibal” Smith, played by Purdue alum George Peppard, and the “A-Team” will see to that …

NO. 7 TEXAS A&M vs. No. 10 Florida State: Angered by their lower-than-deserved seed, the Aggies go “Rip Torn” (a Texas A&M alum) on the Seminoles …

NO. 2 NOTRE DAME vs. No. 15 Akron: Even if alum George Wendt (Norm from “Cheers”) suits up, the Irish roll into the second round …

SOUTHEAST REGION

NO. 1 PITTSBURGH vs. No. 16 UNC-Asheville: Former Panther Adrian Cronauer was immortalized by Robin Williams in “Good Morning, Vietnam.” He’ll be saying “goodbye Asheville” in round one …

No. 8 Butler vs. NO. 9 OLD DOMINION: ODU wins by default for having a former student who did have a hit song in Kenna …

NO. 5 KANSAS STATE vs. No. 12 Utah State: Kirstie Alley went to K-State. Like Sam Malone did with Rebecca, the Aggies will fail against the Wildcats …

NO. 4 WISCONSIN vs. No. 13 Belmont: Not even the aliens from “Cocoon,” for which former Badger Don Ameche received an Oscar, could save the Bruins …

No. 6 St. John’s vs. NO. 11 GONZAGA: Steve Lavin has done an amazing job with the Red Storm in his first year, but I’ll take Bing Crosby’s alma mater here …

NO. 3 BYU vs. No. 14 Wofford: Former Cougar Jeremy Coon produced “Napoleon Dynamite.” BYU routs Wofford, even if Uncle Rico starts …

No. 7 UCLA vs. No. 10 MICHIGAN STATE: As he did in this scene from “The Godfather,” James Caan, a former Spartans, laughs at the notion that the tourney-tested Spartans will lose in the first round …

NO. 2 FLORIDA vs. No. 15 UCSB: Like Sister Hazel, whose band members attended UF, the Gators will win it …

FINAL FOUR: Ohio State, Duke, Kansas, Pittsburgh

NATIONAL CHAMPION: Ohio State over Kansas

Big 12 rankings, Week 8: The Charlie Sheen edition

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What did we learn in 2010-11? That the Big 12 is Kansas’ league until somebody actually dethrones them. That’s seven straight conference titles for the Jayhawks. This week’s rankings include a look back at my preseason predictions (http://tinyurl.com/2ccn3ay) and are brought to you by Vatican assassin warlock Charlie Sheen.

1. KANSAS (29-2, 14-2): A lot of folks picked K-State to win the Big 12. I picked Kansas. Why? Because the Jayhawks always reload, and they should be the favorite next season for that reason. As for winning their seventh straight title, this is what KU is all about …

2. TEXAS (25-6, 13-3): A little off on the record (had UT at 11-5), but did pick the Longhorns second. Great start and disappointing finish for this team, as if they were on the Rick Barnes late-season collapse drug …

3. KANSAS STATE (22-9, 10-6): Picked the Wildcats to finish fifth, and they finished third (did pick K-State to finish 10-6). Kansas State is playing extremely well right now, especially Jacob Pullen, the Wildcats’ Vatican assassin (1:45 mark) …

4. TEXAS A&M (23-7, 10-6): Picked to finish fourth at 10-6 and did so. Give Mark Turgeon credit, his passion (:25 mark) helped push the Aggies to another NCAA bid …

5. COLORADO (19-12, 8-8): Picked to finish ninth at 6-10 and finished tied for fifth at 8-8. To say the Buffs don’t have a shot at the NCAA Tournament is “impulsive” (1:25 mark) …

6. MISSOURI (22-9, 8-8): Picked to finish third at 11-5 and disappointed with a fifth-place finish at 8-8. Losers of three straight, Missouri could use a transfusion of Tiger blood (2:00 mark) …

7. BAYLOR (18-12, 7-9): Said the team was missing something (they are and were) and picked the Bears to finish seventh at 8-8. As for the experts who think Baylor is going to make a surprising run in the conference tourney …

8. NEBRASKA (19-11, 7-9): Projected to finish 10th at 5-11 and tied for seventh at 7-9. What do the Cornhuskers need to do next week to get a tourney bid? Win twice (bi-winning, :10 mark) …

9. OKLAHOMA STATE (18-12, 6-10): Another whiff here. Picked the Cowboys to finish in sixth at 9-7. OSU will need to play like warlocks (:25) next week in Kansas City …

10. TEXAS TECH (13-17, 5-11): Picked to finish 11th at 3-13, the Red Raiders won two more games and finished 10th. Perhaps it was a mistake to replace Bobby Knight with his son, but there’s no need for Texas Tech to be ashamed (:40 mark) …

11. OKLAHOMA (13-17, 5-11): Picked to finish last at 3-13, the Sooners went 5-11 and tied for 10th. Long season for coach Jeff Capel, who isn’t a rock star from Mars (1:30 mark) …

12. IOWA STATE (16-15, 3-13): Projected to finish eighth at 6-10, the Cyclones were dead-last at 3-13. Terrible season for first-year coach Fred Hoiberg, but everybody loves a goddess or two …

Looking for previous rankings?:

Big 12 rankings, Week 7: The “Rocky: edition … http://tinyurl.com/4oun7az

Big 12 rankings, Week 6: Old-school rap edition … http://tinyurl.com/6jqpnr6

Big 12 rankings, Week 5: “Naked Gun” edition … http://tinyurl.com/4akwl7q

Big 12 rankings, Week 4: “Saturday Night Live” editionhttp://tinyurl.com/6aqkw82

Big 12 rankings, Week 3: “Office Space” editionhttp://tinyurl.com/6cw4gy9

Big 12 rankings, Week 2: One-hit wonders edition http://tinyurl.com/4zwe4jl

Big 12 rankings, Week 1: “The Big Lebowski” editionhttp://tinyurl.com/66dexn2