Big 12 rankings, Week 8: The “Seinfeld” edition

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Ernie III and Ernie Jr. on Faurot Field after the upset.

Oh, the irony. The last several years all we’ve heard about is the South dominating the North. On Saturday, the North scored big. Missouri  pushed Oklahoma around in the fourth quarter for a 36-27 win, Nebraska torched Oklahoma State’s Play Station “junior varsity” setting defense in a 51-41 shootout and Iowa State somehow whipped powerful Texas.

What did we learn last week in the Big 12? The North isn’t half bad. And Baylor, yes Baylor, is leading the Big 12 South.

Because Missouri beat Oklahoma, this week’s rankings are brought to you by my favorite TV show, “Seinfeld”:

1. MISSOURI (7-0, 3-0): Last week, defeated Oklahoma 36-27. This week, at Nebraska. It wasn’t just that the Tigers beat the Sooners, it was that they were more physical and dominated the fourth quarter. Just like Jerry rolled in this race …

2. OKLAHOMA (6-1, 2-1): Last week, lost to Missouri 36-27. This week, vs. Colorado. It’s just weird seeing the Sooners pushed around in the fourth quarter of a big game. And Big 12 fans watching this game were thinking, “That’s a shame” …

3. NEBRASKA (6-1, 2-1): Last week, defeated Oklahoma State 51-41. This week, vs. Missouri. I don’t care how much Oklahoma State’s defense sucks (and it does), that was an impressive offensive display. It was the complete opposite of everything the Cornhuskers did against Texas …

4. BAYLOR (6-2, 3-1): Last week, defeated Kansas State 47-42. This week, at Texas. Well, well, well, look who’s leading the South? Want to prove that’s legit, win at Texas this week (which appears to be fairly easy this year when the game’s in Austin). Baylor leading the division, it’s the Bizarro South …

5. OKLAHOMA STATE (6-1, 2-1): Last week, lost to Nebraska 51-41. This week, at Kansas State. Nice defense the Cowboys have fashioned this season. Fifty-one points to Nebraska at home? Oh, here’s Mike Gundy in 20 years …

6. KANSAS STATE (5-3, 2-2): Last week, lost to Baylor 47-42. This week, vs. Oklahoma State. Wow, 700 yards against Baylor? Oklahoma State might rack up 1,000 yards and 60 points this week. Then again, the Cowboys might give up 1,100 yards and 63 points. Bill Snyder? He’s a Mandelbaum …

7. IOWA STATE (4-4, 2-2): Last week, defeated Texas 28-21. This week, vs. Kansas. With the Jayhawks up next and Colorado in a few weeks, the Cyclones have a decent shot at going bowling. As for those games against Missouri and Nebraska, likely to end like the “Frogger” episode …

8. TEXAS (4-3, 2-2): Last week, lost to Iowa State 28-21. This week, vs. Baylor. How do you win at Nebraska one week, then lose to Iowa State at home the next? As for Longhorn fans, they want to do Mack Brown a favor upside his head …

9. TEXAS A&M (4-3, 1-2): Last week, defeated Kansas 45-10. This week, vs. Texas Tech. Remember when Jerrod Johnson was the favorite to earn All-Big 12 first-team honors at quarterback? Me either. As for Aggie fans, they’re gettin’ upset! …

10. TEXAS TECH (4-3, 2-3): Last week, defeated Colorado 27-24. This week, at Texas A&M. The running joke in this space is that I miss Mike Leach. I also miss David Puddy …

11. COLORADO (3-4, 0-3): Last week, lost to Texas Tech 27-24. This week, at Oklahoma. The Buffaloes have wasted a shot at going to a bowl by losing back-to-back close home games to Texas Tech and Baylor. Up next? An angry Oklahoma team. Yikes. As for Dan Hawkins, he’s the Newman of Big 12 coaches …

12. KANSAS (2-5, 0-3): Last week, lost to Texas A&M 45-10. This week, at Iowa State. The Jayhawks continue to solidify their spot as the worse team in conference history. It’s like watching Elaine dance …

Looking for previous Big 12 rankings? …

Week 1, “Tommy Boy” edition: http://tinyurl.com/29anpkt

Week 2, “Dumb and Dumber” edition: http://tinyurl.com/2aamn56 

Week 3, “Napoleon Dynamite” edition: http://tinyurl.com/23rrux5 

Week 4, “Ace Ventura” edition: http://tinyurl.com/24gqo3m

Week 5, “Happy Gilmore” edition: http://tinyurl.com/2c6dy69

Week 6, “Swingers” edition: http://tinyurl.com/2epmfn4

Week 7, Rap videos edition: http://tinyurl.com/2dnfezk

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2 thoughts on “Big 12 rankings, Week 8: The “Seinfeld” edition

    • Ernie Webb III

      Thank you. I’d like to say it was easy, but YouTube blocked at least 15 clips I wanted to use.

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